June 15 2021

 

Been going on and thinking how brave I am attempting to make calls. But I figured out that I’ve cancelled every time before it’s rung. That’s not ballsy I  mean trying to call but not even letting ring. When can I come over this fear? It’s like a million different ones but all about you. Fear of hearing what I already assumed that you don’t care. Fear of my heart breaking even more. Fear of maybe me being wrong. fear of you actually still wanting me. Fear of the future we may or may not have. Fear of me losing my muse by talking it out. But most of all fear of you. You intimidate and scare me. Your success is so inspiring. Makes me wanna make my dreams come true. The saddest part is most of them are about you. After a decade I still feel the same. How I yearn to face the fear, to hopefully make my dreams come true by calling you.

 

 

© A.Rickards June 15, 2021